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Bleak


Alt Names:
Author: A.i.
Artist: A.i.
Genres: Action ActionFantasy FantasyMystery MysteryPsychological PsychologicalRomance RomanceSchool Life School LifeShounen ShounenSlice of Life Slice of Life
Type: Other
Status: Ongoing
Description: Bleak is a coming of age story, a mix of slice-of-life, lucid dreaming and fantasy.

AF is teenager in his second year of highschool, depressed with his life and disappointed with the world.
The thing is, when he gets depressed he sees three little things floating around him, this happens to him since his 10 years of age. Now 15(almost 16) his life gets a bit crazier, when he meets a transfer student in his class, Sane; and an old man in the underground train who he talks about dreams and lucid dreaming.
Suddenly he begins experiencing really strange dreams. Even making him unsure whats real and what´s not anymore.


I update the chapters first on my website every Friday night (GTM+0):
http://www.thedreamcatcherz.com

Follow me on facebook for more info and updates:
https://www.facebook.com/TheDreamCatcherz

Thanks,
AI
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71 Comments

Hey guys, just wanted to say I have a new story : http://bato.to/comic/_/sp/amague-r15949

I'm enjoying this.  If it has a weakness, it's one common to fantasy and SF stories, and one which is hard to avoid:  Too much Expository Lump.  That is, because the situation is all unknown and everything, you end up with all these situations where someone, or the narrator, spends paragraphs explaining it.  SF writers have evolved various techniques for trying to slip stuff in a bit at at time, or as part of the action, or stuff like that.  But it never really went away, and it's particularly hard to avoid when it's one of those stories where not only is the setting alien to the reader, but also to the protagonist.  'Cause for instance, if the protagonist knows what's going on, then conversations about other things can slip in nuggets of precious information offhandedly, apparently as a side effect.  But if  main character is also out of the loop, that's not possible.  You may still be able to play with things like, because the reader knows it's a story, they actually know or can figure in the early stages more than the main character does; as a result you may be able to shortcut bits of in-character explanation by just declaring that they happened and that the MC learned (things that the reader already figured out).  In some cases you can even just say that the MC learned a bunch of things and not tell the audience yet, thus letting you slip in at relevant times the MC remembering that he learned about X that applies to this.  But that's tricky--do that with info that's too important and when you bring it in, it seems like an ass-pull, almost Deus ex Machina.

always nice to read you commnents! thanks!! though I would love to read more opinions about the story itself! haha

I'm enjoying this.  If it has a weakness, it's one common to fantasy and SF stories, and one which is hard to avoid:  Too much Expository Lump.  That is, because the situation is all unknown and everything, you end up with all these situations where someone, or the narrator, spends paragraphs explaining it.  SF writers have evolved various techniques for trying to slip stuff in a bit at at time, or as part of the action, or stuff like that.  But it never really went away, and it's particularly hard to avoid when it's one of those stories where not only is the setting alien to the reader, but also to the protagonist.  'Cause for instance, if the protagonist knows what's going on, then conversations about other things can slip in nuggets of precious information offhandedly, apparently as a side effect.  But if  main character is also out of the loop, that's not possible.  You may still be able to play with things like, because the reader knows it's a story, they actually know or can figure in the early stages more than the main character does; as a result you may be able to shortcut bits of in-character explanation by just declaring that they happened and that the MC learned (things that the reader already figured out).  In some cases you can even just say that the MC learned a bunch of things and not tell the audience yet, thus letting you slip in at relevant times the MC remembering that he learned about X that applies to this.  But that's tricky--do that with info that's too important and when you bring it in, it seems like an ass-pull, almost Deus ex Machina.

Interesting story, A.I. is doing a pretty good job on it, the whole reading is really enjoyable.

updated: corrected mistakes on chapter 7...sorry...

thanks a lot for the 300 follows :) hope you guys continue enjoying the story...and start commenting it! :P

I checked it just now and it seems to be working fine, do you still get the error?

Yeah.  Well, the web is weird; maybe I'm having a bad interaction with a plugin, or something.

Tiny note--I went to reread to get a handle on where we're at, and noticed that ch. 4 seems to not be working with 404 errors.

(So I went to thedreamcatcherz.com to find it, so that's fine, but maybe it needs re-uploading or something)

Cheers!

I checked it just now and it seems to be working fine, do you still get the error?

Tiny note--I went to reread to get a handle on where we're at, and noticed that ch. 4 seems to not be working with 404 errors.

(So I went to thedreamcatcherz.com to find it, so that's fine, but maybe it needs re-uploading or something)

Cheers!

There are plenty of places where you can write novels one chapter at a time and get constructive criticism.

could you provide me the links? I don't know any. I`m just trying to update my story, i think its the story that matters after all and if its comic or novel is secondary. I don't think I`m doing anything wrong since I`m simply updating the page for my comic, meant for the people that follow it. This place has manga, has manwa, as Webtoons, I think what matters is its all about story telling so no need to be picky about the media...
After all if we get really picky then 99 per cent of the manga on this website shouldn`t be here either since its, well, illegal...

If I go to a website only dedicated to writing then they will get picky about how I will have illustrations and comic strips now and then, and say i should go to a comic website...

Its not even a manga anymore now

 

Without caring about quality,

Without caring about where it came from,

It is no longer manga and shouldn't be updated here.

 

There are plenty of places where you can write novels one chapter at a time and get constructive criticism. This is not one of those places. For people who like the story from the comic you uploaded so far, you can provide a link to where you continue or restart the story, but it's not what people who are at a manga hosting site want to see.

 

I'm all for you writing your novel, but why would you think that it's the right thing to do to pretend it's manga? Keep up the manga pages here, link to your novel in the description, and maybe every few months or so add another chapter in manga version as you have time. I think that would be better. Alternately, just stop updating here after you throw the link up. :)

EDIT: sorry guys, chapter 6 was missing a page...uploaded a corrected version just now. Once again sorry for the confusion...

A mix of necessity and desire. I wanted to make a novel version of Bleak since I think it works really well (I actually always write it in novel form first) but now I decided to go ahead with the idea all the way, I guess I was a bit a afraid people wouldn`t give the story a chance if it was a novel but now I just want to do the way I want. Remember though that there will be comic strips and illustrations in the novel, since I draw very slowly and im such a perfectionist I decided to give my all on a few comic strips and make it epic.
The story is the same though, and now I finally can develop it weekly, so please guys if you liked the story so far just give it a chance.

ah, alright, so both are the case. Well, if thats what u want i can only give u credit for following what u want, and wish u good luck. Novels arent my style, but thats just the opinion of one of your readers, dont let that influence you :P

Alright, ill look at it longer, and see how it turns out man :)

Its not even a manga anymore now, im sad to see this, as i quite enjoyed the illustrations. Did u do it out of neccisity to shorten the time u work on it? Im sorry but this is not what i came for, ill have to let it go, but wish u all the best man

A mix of necessity and desire. I wanted to make a novel version of Bleak since I think it works really well (I actually always write it in novel form first) but now I decided to go ahead with the idea all the way, I guess I was a bit a afraid people wouldn`t give the story a chance if it was a novel but now I just want to do the way I want. Remember though that there will be comic strips and illustrations in the novel, since I draw very slowly and im such a perfectionist I decided to give my all on a few comic strips and make it epic.


The story is the same though, and now I finally can develop it weekly, so please guys if you liked the story so far just give it a chance.

 

Its not even a manga anymore now, im sad to see this, as i quite enjoyed the illustrations. Did u do it out of neccisity to shorten the time u work on it? Im sorry but this is not what i came for, ill have to let it go, but wish u all the best man

is this still ongoing?

Yes, just on hiatus

is this still ongoing?

Too much text for me! If you could minimize the text in only one page in the beginning of the chapter, something like a detailed intro and then give us the characters in "flesh" it would be a lot better imo.

Also the text gets a little difficult to read sometimes because imo, you are describing in too much detail the thought process of Pierrot.

In his dialogue with Eric particularly, you both write what he thinks and then you also write his respond to Eric, almost in every word exchange they have. Aside that, I think that even in the novel story telling you are talented, but you might need to work more on it.

 

The story so far is good.It's the beginning though and the challenging part will come later. Your plot is very ambitious both story-wise and art-wise. Creating a word of dreams is very compelling and  I am looking forward to see you drawing it in more detail.

 

I am looking forward to the future releases. :)

thanks for taking some time to write an interesting feedback!
(but...who is Eric? xD you mean Rec? and Pierrot you mean AF I presume)

This is a completely new format I'm working on, I'm still discovering it on my own how to mix the comic and novel part better and better, because I want it to have the comic part but also the novel feel.

And you are correct, the more the chapters advance the more complex the plot becomes and more characters the story get, so its gona be more difficult to keep track of everything carefully!

AF monologues a lot, haha, thats just how he is and part of the story, not sure if thats gona change but the monologue is certainly heavier in the beginning chapters when everything is so new to him and to the reader.

What do you guys think of the new chapter? Too much text? should i balance better the manga/novel thing?

and your thoughts about the story?

Too much text for me! If you could minimize the text in only one page in the beginning of the chapter, something like a detailed intro and then give us the characters in "flesh" it would be a lot better imo.

Also the text gets a little difficult to read sometimes because imo, you are describing in too much detail the thought process of Pierrot.

In his dialogue with Eric particularly, you both write what he thinks and then you also write his respond to Eric, almost in every word exchange they have. Aside that, I think that even in the novel story telling you are talented, but you might need to work more on it.

 

The story so far is good.It's the beginning though and the challenging part will come later. Your plot is very ambitious both story-wise and art-wise. Creating a word of dreams is very compelling and  I am looking forward to see you drawing it in more detail.

 

I am looking forward to the future releases. :)

What do you guys think of the new chapter? Too much text? should i balance better the manga/novel thing?

and your thoughts about the story?

Thanks for the new chapter! Although i personally dont mind reading it in novel form, hopefully the large blocks of text without any pictures won't dissuade any ppl from reading this!

thanks! Yeah I hope people will understand that the story is still the same so there is no reason to dislike it now if you liked the previous chapters, on the contrary now there is much more content per chapter! I hope that encourages people to discuss the releases since I would love to hear speculations and opinions.

Thanks for the new chapter! Although i personally dont mind reading it in novel form, hopefully the large blocks of text without any pictures won't dissuade any ppl from reading this!

thanks! I really appreciate the support!
Those kind of comments were mostly on the Dead+Heart teaser, wish is only based on a single page.
But yeah, Im been trying to improve my art style in general, girls included.

Dont worry, I didnt quite or anything, Im just having a difficult time right now and trying to improve how I create Bleak, when I came back I hope it will be for real with constant releases.

Its cool to find another comic artist, whats your series name?
 

 

my comic's name is Thaeria

http://www.batoto.net/comic/_/sp/tales-of-thaeria-dancing-with-the-devil-r11374

it's probably completely different than yours, tough I think maybe more similar to dead+heart in genre ^^

I've only released one chapter, webtoon style, sizes are still a bit messed up, but I don't want to spam followers by releasing the same chapter over and over again 

 

Tell me what you think if you'll read it^^

From page 14 of chapter 3, I had no idea what was going on. Eh, still Followed. 

This is quite good, and there's no reason a single-person project should be any less great than a full-team one. Many of the webcomics I read are miles above 80% of the manga on this site, both in story and art, and are made by one or two people. The one real difference is update speed, but I'm fine with slower releases.

 

I salute your industry, AI. Thank you for making your hard work available for my entertainment; I hope you continue working on this. If you start releasing regularly, I will probablly add your website to the list of comics I read.


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